Auchtoon!

I have a life hack for you. It applies mostly to guys (at least that has been my experience), but I think everybody could find it useful. Here it is: If you are ever in a situation where people are encouraging you to do something by telling you “don’t be a p—-y,” then don’t do it. In other words, never do what they are encouraging you to do. Simple, right? Not following their advice is 100% always the right choice.

Now, there will be instances in life when you’ll be advised to step up, take responsibility, even “be a man.” Sometimes those giving the advice will have your best interests in heart, and you can at least consider taking it. But if they say “don’t be a p—-y,” yeah, they don’t care about you.

Here’s a similar one: People who talk only rights but never responsibilities are better off not being listened to. What they are saying is all about them and nothing about you (or anybody else really).

I didn’t come up with the rights/responsibilities life hack myself. It’s from a podcast I heard recently, but it might as well have been from a high school civics course. Citizens taking care to exercise their rights responsibly is a basic tenant on which democracies depend to function properly. 

Also, don’t drink bleach. That’s another good one.

Have you ever had to endure an interview for a job you knew that you were not going to get? Or an audition for a part in a show that you were certain was going to go to somebody else? You had absolutely no chance but you were obligated somehow to go through the motions anyway.

That’s how I imagine it was for Governor Snyder when he was in Washington DC recently trying to convince his Republican colleagues to keep the Medicaid expansion of the ACA (Obamacare). In Michigan, that expansion is known as Healthy Michigan, and there are approximately 650,000 Michiganders who depend on it for insurance. The current Republican plan, the ACHA (Trumpcare), would be the end of Healthy Michigan, and Snyder was trying to point out the social, economic, and political costs of doing that. It’s pretty clear nobody had any intention of listening to him.

But points to Governor Snyder. I mean, I’m not letting him off the hook for the Flint Water Crisis (that’s obvious from the cartoon), but I appreciate the effort. It was good to see him sticking up for Michigan citizens, especially some of the more vulnerable. And even if it was all about money, it was still good to see him playing what used to be a traditional Republican role — defending the option that makes the best economic sense.

It may have been all an exercise in futility, but there are worse fates. I’d much rather be Rick Snyder as a voice nobody is hearing than Paul Ryan as a voice nobody is believing.