Auchtoon!

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Business Journal, June 15, 2009

And then sometimes the editorial cartoons get a bit autobiographical. Long story, but suffice to say despite a lifetime of exemplary financial practices, we will not (at least at this point) be saving ourselves approximately $70,000 in interest over the next 15 years.

Strongly considering massive deficit spending and then scoring a bailout…

Hey, for all you folks with a Flint connection, this may be of interest to you. My sister’s Flint Powers classmate, Gordon Young, has an article in Slate magazine. Gordon is creator of the an addictive blog called Flint Expatriates.

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Business Journal, June 8, 2009

Big thanks to Andrew and Ben at 2G Techworks for solving my blog software issue. I tried the “Oscar Rogers” approach with Yahoo Small Business. (See above.) Didn’t work so well. Andrew and Ben apparently went another route ’cause it’s been FIXED!

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Business Journal, June 1, 2009

You know things are bad when your local editorial cartoonist grows weary of all the terrible news. Like dung beetles, we typically thrive on that, um, stuff. But geez, it is summer! So in the midst of this spectacularly awful Michigan season of foreclosure and bankruptcy and unemployment and general despair, I was looking for a ray of sunshine.

And in West Michigan that came in the form of our 40^th annual Festival of Arts. Every year in the first weekend of June, volunteers organize an effort to take over several downtown city blocks to put on a street party. There are food booths galore with impressive varieties. There are tents filled with artworks from the sublime to the strange. There are several stages where the young and old entertain in a steady stream. It really is impressive. Check it out next year. Assuming there is a Michigan then. (Back to despair.)

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Business Journal, May 25, 2009

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Family magazine, May 2009

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Business Journal, May 18, 2009

My wife and I own a small business. We self-insure for medical costs. Every time we get a medical bill with nothing covered by insurance (which is often) or every time the premium goes up by double-digit percentages (which is always), I feel like we’re being consumed by a crocodile. And what good is having the best medical care system in the world (which I doubt) if nobody can afford it?

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Business Journal, May 11, 2009

The next time you start ranting on how messed up the world is today, how movies and entertainment are much too violent and depraved, and how we are hitting record highs (or lows) on the debauchery meter, take some quiet time to read a book on Greek mythology. Dude, that stuff is messed up! I mean, Quentin Tarantino writes nursery rhymes compared to some of this Greek mythology stuff. (Wait, as it turns out, most nursery rhymes are pretty messed up, too. How about, “Quentin Tarantino makes Disney movies compared to …no, that doesn’t hold, either. Have you ever seen Disney’s “Pinocchio”? Or “Dumbo”? Freaky, weird sh–, er, stuff.)

I remember reading the story of Prometheus when I was in 6th grade. Basically, as a punishment for stealing and sharing the gods’ fire with humans, Zeus has Prometheus chained to a side of a mountain where a bird (usually described as a giant eagle) pecks out his liver. The next day the liver grows back and the eagle returns to eat it again. And so on. It wasn’t till I dissected a frog in high school that I truly understood the nastiness of this.

Not quite as nasty — but certainly unpleasant — is being the Mayor of a mid-size city and year after year having less money from the state (money your taxpaying citizens sent to the state) to pay for vital services. Definitely hyperbole to compare it to involuntary organ donation, but hyperbole is what cartoonists do. I was trying to figure a way to draw this and actually show a Governor Granholm bird tearing out a Mayor Heartwell liver, but I couldn’t figure a way to do it without a bunch of confusing labels. You will have to look forward to next week when I’ll post a drawing of a man being consumed by a crocodile. What’s the matter with the world today?…