Auchtoon!

Originally published in the Ann Arbor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
October 28, 2012

Yeah, I don’t know. I had higher hopes for this cartoon. There were two thoughts that amused me. The first was about the proposals. Here I am a Michigan editorial cartoonist who is supposed to know stuff about this stuff, and I have a hard time remembering which one is which. (This is, by the way, exactly the reason why ballot proposals amending the state constitution are a bad idea. Who can fully grasp the full intentions of these things, let alone the potential consequences?)

The other thing that struck me funny was the idea of voters with this vague notion of Pete Hoekstra — sort of like, “it must be time to vote because there’s that Pete Hoekstra guy again and he seems to be running for something.” I could try to explain to you why I think that’s funny, but then it wouldn’t be funny.

After that, I was just casting about for additional thoughts. The obvious one last Thursday when I was drawing this was that Michiganders would be totally pre-occupied with the Tigers and the World Series. But by the time the cartoon hit the newspapers Sunday, the Tigers were swept. *Sigh* Maybe that’s why I don’t have any particular enthusiasm for the cartoon anymore. Summer is now totally over and we only have elections to look forward to….

Originally published in the Ann Arbor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
October 21, 2012

Four years ago, the McCain campaign pulled out of Michigan in October, ceding the state to Obama. Sara Palin rather famously and publically disagreed with the decision and wanted to fight on. The so-called mainstream media in Michigan never loved her more at that moment. But alas it was not to be. Without a designation as a battleground state, millions of media dollars were not spent here. Most were spent in Ohio.

Fast-forward to 2012. Back in September pollsters figured Michigan to be leaning Obama and again those ad dollars never made it north of Toledo. Luckily for our election economy, we have six ballot proposals of dubious merit for many special interest groups and one billionaire robber-baron to throw money at. And, boy, have they!

So my idea with this week’s comic was simply to tie this together. Since apparently the end always justifies the means when it comes to amending our state constitution, why not guarantee ourselves a piece of the presidential campaign money? Not any more crazy than, say, Proposal 6.

Originally published in the Ann Arbor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
October 14, 2012

I may have mentioned this before, but when I was 10 years-old, I got to meet Vincent Price. My folks took us to see a production of “Damn Yankees” at the Start Theater in Flint. (Damn Yankees is a musical about a regular guy, Joe, and a fan of the Washington Senators, a baseball team that always loses to the New York Yankees. He makes a deal with the devil to become the Senators’ star player and lead his team to beat the Yankees. Price, of course, played the part of the devil.)

After the show, we waited in a line for autographs. When we got to Price, I made some mention of his devils tail, something like, “How is your tail?” (A running gag in the show was the devil trying to conceal his tail and it getting injured.) What I said was not memorable and certainly not witty, but Price did give me a professional chuckle and made eye contact with me. I remember thinking two things: “This is incredibly wonderful — I made Vincent Price chuckle” and “That man is impossibly old.”

I was thinking about the tail in particular when I was drawing Ambassador Bridge owner Matty Moroun in the second panel. If you have been unfortunate enough to experience a “Vote Yes for Prop 5/Prop 6” ad (and if you lived in Michigan the past few months, you definitely have), you know the deals Moroun is spending millions to make with you. It’s sickening really to the point of comical (and then back to sickening again). I wanted to add something to let readers know that I think Moroun is playing the role of Mephistopheles here — trying to trick voters into very bad decisions. But I wanted to be subtle, and the tail seemed like a good solution. So take heed Michigan voters! Or in the coming weeks I may have to add the horns, pitchfork, and cape.

Originally published in the Ann Arbor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
October 7, 2012

ArtPrize, the world’s largest art competition, took place in Grand Rapids over the past few weeks. Winners were announced last Friday with over $560,000 in prize money awarded. This was the fourth year for ArtPrize, and it was amazingly successful. The big prizes are determined on a public vote — people come downtown and cast votes on what they like. No ads. No campaigning. Very democratic and — especially in an election year — kind of refreshing.

I myself didn’t actually make it to ArtPrize this year. On the beautiful weekends when strolling the streets of downtown Grand Rapids was at its prime, I was laboring on my own sort of art project at home — putting a new roof on my shed. In the many moments when I was adapting my plans (and making yet another trip to the hardware store), I thought about how this thing would make, like, the worst ArtPrize entry ever. As with most large, publically viewable art installation, its purpose and worth is subject to opinion. It’s either a ghastly but marginally functional architectural solution or some sort of God-awful plastic/treated lumber prophylactic or an unwittingly efficient pre-made home for wasps, hornets, and other very angry buzzy things. Or all of these things. Don’t worry. I have no way of transporting it, so you are all safe to go to ArtPrize next year.

Originally published in the Ann Arbor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
September 30, 2012

Originally published in the Ann Arbor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
September 23, 2012

When I was at the editorial cartoonist convention last week, one of the events was a reception at the US Capitol, specifically the House Committee on Agriculture’s Hearing Room. I’m not really sure what the exact connection to agriculture was, but it was a big room with comfy seats and a pleasant place for House Majority Whip Rep. Kevin McCarthy and Rep. Jim McGovern to talk with us. After the formal niceties, we were able to ask the congressmen a few questions. Rep. McCarthy had brought up immigration and voting rights, and things go very testy very quickly. Rep. McCarthy extolled the virtues of voter integrity; the cartoonists challenged him on ulterior motives. Rep. McCarthy strained smiles and explained in a patronizing way the big picture; the cartoonists disassembled the big picture and questioned his logic. Soon aides stepped in and whisked Rep. Kevin McCarthy to his next appointment (whether he actually had one or not). Rep. McGovern stuck to stories about how his father was a liquor store owner. Things went better for him.

This cartoon has been kicking around my head since the primary vote in August. Our Secretary of State in Michigan, Ruth Johnson, decided (despite Governor Snyder’s opposition) to have this question on the ballot: Are you a United States citizen? A valid question for a voter, sure, but one that had never been on a ballot before. It caused a lot of confusion. At first, you had to check Yes to vote. But then during the election day a clarification was sent that voters could opt out of answering the question. Now it is supposed to be on the November ballot. Ms. Johnson thinks it’s “a helpful reminder.” But decisions were not made in time for it to be on absentee ballots. Messy to say the least. If we could just get Ms. Johnson to address a room full of cartoonists, I’m sure we could get this straightened out.

Cool NPR story on the cartoonist convention last weekend: http://www.npr.org/2012/09/16/161241554/another-convention-this-for-political-cartoonists

Originally published in the Ann Arbor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
September 16, 2012

Our Governor Snyder this past week floated the idea of updating our state’s relationship with Blue Cross/Blue Shield of Michigan (BCBSM). Currently by law, BCBSM is the insurer of last resort. That is, they cannot reject you even if all other insurers have. In exchange for this, BCBSM gets certain tax advantages. Now if the Affordable Health Care Act (Obamacare) actually goes into practice (and even Romney has hinted that he would keep popular reforms like no rejecting for pre-existing conditions), there is no reason for BCBSM to have this special relationship with the state. So Governor Snyder is simply saying, “let’s start planning for this.”

But if we have learned anything these past few years it’s that good intentions for reforming health care will soon be met with hysteria. Reform will inevitably make somebody’s life worse — if even ever so slightly — and that will not go well. Let the hysteria begin!

Originally published in the Ann Arbor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
September 9, 2012

There are few emotions that rival the intensity of the hatred car owners can carry for manufacturers who sold them a lemon. And let’s face it, automobile manufacturers built a lot of lemons over the years. So I can understand lingering animosity toward General Motors and the 2008/9 bailout. They screwed up. They built some lousy cars. They made a lot of people angry. (At one point, General Motors controlled 50% of the American market, so there is a pretty good chance you are one of those people.) But I do think the bailout was the right thing to save our whole manufacturing sector from sucking down a sinkhole, and it has on the whole helped revitalize the auto industry here in the US. (It does, however, make me wince when the Democrats trumpet the success. Don’t they realize how volatile the automobile market is? Don’t they realize how quickly fortunes change? Toyota anyone? They are just asking for a karma smackdown, and we don’t need that in Michigan.)

Speaking of karma, I really shouldn’t disparage the mighty Vega without this full disclosure: on Spring Break of my senior year of high school, my friend Dominic’s Vega took me, him, and friends Lewis and Joe from Michigan to Pennsylvania to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina, and back home without any problems. I remember it not being too happy climbing mountains and my head still has dents from hitting the stylish hatchback roofline on every bump, but credit where credit is due. It may have turned into a pile of dust once it reached Dominic’s driveway, but it got the job done.

Originally published in the Ann Arbor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
September 2, 2012

Ballot proposals are not my favorite. Under the guise of “let the people decide,” they are almost always an end-run around the actual legislative process (you know, the system where laws are supposed to come from). This November, we have potential for several stinkers, pretty much all led by moneyed self-interest groups trying to make laws and alter the constitution to meet their very narrow view of what Michigan should be. So this cartoon is my solution. (Actually, my other suggestion is to vote on making the day after Labor Day “Not Quite Ready for School to Start Day.” Everybody would get the day off, but you would have to play outside.)