Auchtoon!

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Press, July 2, 2011

Here’s the thing: I’ve been an American all my life, and I still don’t really understand our obsession with handguns and the visceral need for some to possess them. I think it all likely stems from fear. Fear built upon fear built upon fear over time. And now it’s a societal instinct to get firearms when we feel a threat. I don’t think the answer is to ban handguns. Banning stuff in America typically doesn’t work very well. We like the stuff we like, legal or not. Honestly, I don’t know exactly what to do. But if I were a politician and could create a well-intentioned but completely unenforceable law (the type of reactionary laws that get people re-elected), it would be this: If I wanted to buy a handgun, I would have to wait one week. And during that week, I could do anything I wanted except watch TV news. And if — after that one week of not stewing in the worst of human behavior — I was still fearful, then, yes, I could buy the gun. (Plus, there would be a background check on me. Because who in their right mind would sell me a gun if I had a criminal background? Um, right?…)

I’m sure you all know about the guy in Grand Rapids who snapped last week and killed seven people and then himself. It was a horrible thing. But instead of wasting our energy and money stocking up on weapons or trying to get rid of them all, maybe we should concentrate on improving the health support structure to identify and treat mental illness. Which is to say, reduce the fear for everybody.

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Press, June 25, 2011

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Press, June 18, 2011

As a Detroit Pistons fan, it’s important for all of you to know that I was hatin’ on LeBron James long before it became popular. James and his Cleveland Cavaliers were beating on my Pistons for a number of years, and I took that personally. Similarly, I was way ahead of hating Michael Jordon and his Chicago Bulls significantly before the world turned on him. (If I’m going to embrace the unpleasant human foible of hating somebody I’ve never even met, well, at least I’m not trendy.) Oh, and I still hate Danny Ainge.

I don’t know Bernard Taylor, but I don’t hate him. Taylor is the current (for now) superintendent of Grand Rapids Public Schools. Recently he has been a final candidate for superintendent of some higher profile school systems — one of which was Cleveland. How ironic! (And by “ironic” I mean “coincidental.”) At this point, the Grand Rapids school board is understandably concerned about Taylor’s intentions and loyalties. So as a favor, I decided to draw a cartoon to warn him of how not to announce his future decisions.

For somebody so apparently hateful, I sure am a nice guy.

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Press, June 11, 2011

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Press, June 4, 2011

If you haven’t already seen or heard about the Grand Rapids LipDub, you can check it out here on YouTube. It really is a very, very impressive community effort and a convincing counter to Newsweek magazine’s online article last winter that listed Grand Rapids as one of America’s “dying cities.” Leave it to an editorial cartoonist to find a negative in the positive. But honestly, “American Pie” can be such an earworm!

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Press, May 28, 2011

If I drew this with any sanctimony, it was gone yesterday when gas prices, which had edged down to around $3.80 after the Memorial Day weekend, shot up to $4.19 in West Michigan. I was very much like Uncle Sam in panel 4, except I was directly appealing to a higher authority to smite the bastards who might be profiting from this crazy leap….

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Press, May 21, 2011

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Press, May 14, 2011

Originally published in the Grand Rapids Press, May 7, 2011

The Rapid is the Grand Rapids area public transportation system. On Tuesday, voters approved of a small millage increase to improve and expand the system. There was a group vehemently apposed to the millage (curiously led by a man living who could not actually vote because he resides outside the service area). And I say God bless them. Every worthy public project — be it transportation, school, library, what have you — needs to be tested by the fires of the extremely grouchy tax money watchers. Those fiscal curmudgeons provide quite a valuable service — they definitely keep organizations on their toes. But now that the vote is over, I’m guessing some just won’t be able to let it go….

Intended to be published in the Grand Rapids Press, April 30, 2011

This was supposed to be run in tomorrow’s Press, but unfortunately it won’t be able to. Last week, longtime news anchor Suzanne Geha was let go from Grand Rapids TV station WOOD TV 8. Geha was more or less an icon at the station and certainly the face of their news organization. I have no idea of the details, but it struck me as, well, cold. You put all those years into an organization and then, this? Actually, Ben Folds captures the feeling awfully well in his song, “Fred Jones Part 2”: