What Makes a Michigan Sports Fan Angry in June?…

Originally published in the Ann Abor News, Bay City Times, Flint Journal, Grand Rapids Press, Jackson Citizen Patriot, Kalamazoo Gazette, Muskegon Chronicle, Saginaw News
June 3, 2012

 Even though I am very much an advocate for keeping an open mind, I will admit to having certain prejudices. For instance, music by punk bands should never be played on “Classic Rock” radio stations — Foghat; Emerson, Lake & Palmer; then The Clash? That’s just wrong.
Also, breakfast cereals should never be mixed. Chemical engineers in the manufactured food industry have taken a great deal of time and effort in formulating just the right combinations of food-like materials to create a single cereal. To take the last bits of nearly empty boxes, combine them in a single bowl, and then activate the highly volatile mix with milk — you’re just inviting trouble.
And Newt Gingrich should never be elected to be the President of the United States of America. Some people were seriously considering this only a few months ago! I’m not kidding — look it up!

But one maybe slightly unreasonable prejudice that I can’t seem to shake is that I believe professional ice hockey teams from the southern United Sates should not be successful. They have sun and pleasant winters and no Canadian coins mixed in with their loose change. How could they possibly have the proper appreciation for a good hockey team? They can’t! They don’t! And that’s why it’s unsettling to see the Los Angeles Kings in the Stanley Cup finals. But I know this is my problem that I just have to work through it. Maybe next year it will be something like Detroit vs. Montreal and the world will make sense again….


  1. Kris said,

    June 5, 2012 @ 9:14 am

    I totally agree. Although I hope that you aren’t discarding those last bits of cereal. Do you eat them separately but in succession to create a full meal? I’d love to see Detroit in the finals next year. If you wait a year, perhaps you can have Tim Thomas back in his home state to help. He is a great goalie but an odd duck that just never took to the water in Boston. For now though, we have to focus on the Celtics – how can you not love this old team?

  2. Ellie said,

    June 5, 2012 @ 9:52 am

    He used to tell us that the last bits of cereal were “magic dust.” We fought over it when we were little. Some of this competitive mindset still remains, so I cannot let the last bits of cereal go untouched. I cannot speak for my father, of course, but I can confirm that he taught me well.

  3. John said,

    June 5, 2012 @ 12:07 pm

    Pour cereal, add milk, eat , rinse, repeat. That’s how it’s done!

    Re: Celtics. For me it’s still difficult to pull for the Celts (as we say in Michigan, “I still hate Ainge.”), but anybody but the Heat is good.

    Re: Magic dust. I consider an obscure Cheech & Chong reference to be a passable parenting infraction. I consider naming your dollhouse couple “Sid and Nancy” much worse.

  4. Ellie said,

    June 5, 2012 @ 2:00 pm

    One would hope that our naming the babies Mary and Jesus balanced out whatever wrath God was going to throw your way.

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