Old (and Hilarious) Magazine Ads…

It’s problematic to say the least that there exists a world of very interesting things on the other side of my work computer. Curse you high-speed Internet connection! Why must you be so wonderful?! Actually, I think I handle it pretty well. Other than an ongoing addiction to Wikipedia, I manage to steer clear of that which does not translate to billable hours. Mostly. But last week I was tempted away by a link I found in a Graphic Designer newsletter. (So in a very rationalized way, it was in fact work.)

Some evil person has spent a considerable amount of time scanning ads from old magazines and indexing them very nicely. Old magazines (Life, Saturday Evening Post, Colliers, and the like) are a terrible weakness of mine. They are filled with historical articles, classic comics, beautiful photography, and campy ads. So I stole time in between chores to read some from the 1930s and early 1940s, and email favorites to my wife and equally Wikipedia-addicted daughter. Check ‘em out. Once you’re there, you can click the “View Larger Image” link to see details:

“So help me, I’ll beat the crap out of little Timmy …literally!”

Ah, yes! Remember when “willfully stupid” was an endearing trait in a women (excuse me, girl)?  

Whoever thought any product called “Crab Orchard” was a good idea?! And is it just me, or is this the gayest ad ever?

Let’s see: empty sugar, corrosive acid, addictive stimulants … oh, wait! They serve it in hospitals? Never mind, everything is a-okay here!

Our house was built in 1941 with these shingles (and still has them). And that’s pretty much what our living room looked like when we moved in.

Lead! Lead! We make paint out of LEAD!

Apparently, “copywriters” back in the “1940s” got “paid” not by the “quality” of their “writing,” but by “the” number of “quotation marks” they “used.”

Good news! Candy is food for work!

Aren’t men difficult? And by “difficult,” I mean, “jerks.”

Inspiration for the classic SNL bit, “It’s a floor cleaner; no, it’s a dessert topping!”?

1 Comment »

  1. Kris said,

    March 27, 2009 @ 7:04 pm

    I always knew there was something wrong with the ‘sting’ of Listerine. It really wasn’t meant to be a mouth rinse. Makes sense. Lead, asbestos, candy, nicotine, laxatives, plying your boss with whiskey in a thinly veiled attempt to ‘work your way up the ladder’, making sure the juices stay in the cherry pie…..good times. Good, wholesome times.

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